I AM SUFFERING (or GROWING) FROM A "FALL" INTENSELY DISORDER
Enough hiding in the dark and enough being ashamed of!
Dear Explorers,
First of all some quick housekeeping. Recently, I have overhauled my blogging strategy.
Instead of publishing “spiritual-esque” content on Substack (Whole Explorers) and personal reflections and stories on Ghost (erstwhile Whole Humans), and mental health and environment and sustainability oriented content on Medium, I have simplified everything to avoid confusion for you and make my life simpler as well.
So, I will publish the same content i.e. multidisciplinary or interdisciplinary reflections on the human longing to be free, on all the platforms with same name i.e Whole Explorers and same username i.e. @wholeexplorer
I was a regular at the first three platforms but I came across a great app “Ulysses” which let me write once, with all the bells and whistles, and publish on all the (four) platforms at once, except Substack.
What’s more! As I have taken the premium plan of Micro.blog it allows publishing the blog link with Headline and Tags on most of the social media platforms that I have connected with it automatically.
So, Ulysses sends to all the four platforms and Micro.blog sends to connected social medial platforms (X, Threads, Mastodon). Isn’t it amazing! So much time and energy saved. Also, I hated sharing the blog posts on social media after publishing! Such a relief that it is automated.
Currently, it’s all messed up, some posts are on one platform and not the others. In the coming days and months, my aim is to make it uniform across all the platforms and use automation to the extent possible.
But, I will send the email newsletter only from a single platform, either Substack or Ghost, that I am yet to decide. Because I know how it feels like to be spammed with different newsletters.
Why publish on so many platforms, you might ask?
To find ‘my kind of people’. Simple. I have no intentions of monetizing any of my blogs in the near future. And even if I do I will make it voluntary like Maria Popova (Marginalian) and Aeon+Psyche magazine do- accept donations to keep doing what they love. And maybe even donate further what’s surplus.
Now onto today’s post for which I mustered enough courage to reveal the scars of my soul.
Before my well-wishers declare it to the world and make my world a terrible heaven to live in, I wish to come out clean and openly admit that, YES, I am suffering from a psych disorder just like Van Gogh suffered, just like Kurt Cobain suffered, just like Dostoyevsky suffered and all the rest of the creatives.
Because collective insanity is acceptable and sometimes even respected.
And I would like to take this opportunity of renaming this ill-named disorder as 'FALL' intensely disorder.
F- Feeling
A- And
L - Living
L -: Life
(Life is a sine wave and I live that Wave intensely. I know no other way)
And it is called a Dis-Order because it happens to only a few of us. I wish if it happened to most of us this world would have been a better place.
And then it won't be called as 'Dis-Order' by "them".
Why?
Because collective insanity is acceptable and sometimes even respected.
And we are afraid of flying higher because we are afraid of falling (FALL-ing) harder to the ground, which is inevitable. But if we somehow get rid of the fear of falling?
We might someday fly so high
as to make a hole in the sky
(and arrive in a world we belong)
And this could happen if we start taking therapy from life teachers.
It took me around three and a half years to come out in the open and disclosing my mental affliction. Actually, it is not mental. Now my understanding has evolved and I see my (human) condition as "Soul Sickness".
(I feel lighter already! The Eminem song, "Not Afraid", is coming to my mind)
It is neither a "brain" disorder or "mental" illness or even "psych" affliction. These all are just words. And the words prescribed by some "Doctors" can not define who you are.
We are a soul. And until we reach a place where we belong we will be beset with this sickening soul sickness.
And now I am not afraid by anyone or anything to speak my mind. I am ready to face the music because music and books and friends are my companions on this long, arduous journey from soul suffocation to soul satisfaction.
Would you like or love to join me? Or make fun of my illness?